Pyar ek dhoka hai (Valentine's Day Special)

It was a small apartment with a bunch of people in there. A lot of noises coming out of the front door.
Shhhh!! One of them raised a hand and said, you're gonna get us out of the society.

Everyone fell still for a second and started discussing rather debating whether MBA is the ultimate career choice.
She was about to say something.. I think..
When a hand showed up right in front of her face and he said, You be quiet! I'll take it over from here.

She's used to being cut off by him during conversations. It's a way by which he protects her from being proved wrong by other people. You don't know how to talk to people, or what to say and when to say you'll make a fool of yourself, he used to say.

They've been together for 3 years now. Fighting their own battles and fighting each other too.

He never felt much like talking on the phone for hours but he had to. He used to scroll through his phone with his earphones on just to get past that daily 1 hour call before she sleeps.

He used to think if he's really in love or it's just something he has to do just to get laid. He wasn't sure if he knew what love was.

Their entire life was revolving around each other. All they used to do was hang out with each other.
She did all she could just to be with him while he was still trying to understand what actually love is.
I believe I should put in all efforts and not expect she used to argue

She used to take care of everything he didn't like. From her attire to food habits, her time at work, even her thoughts revolved around his interest.

3 years into the relationship sometimes she used to doubt her mere existence as an individual.
At some point she has sacrificed her family too just to take care of his ego.

It's been a year since then,
She was thinking all about how immature she used to be.

 She's an independent women now. She can take her own decisions.This marriage is one of those.

She looked into the mirror, her dress looked amazing.

She knew her husband is nothing like him.

#PyarEkDhokaHai...
#NikalLeBetaMaukaHai

Random jibber-jabber

Hey please handle my phone carefully it's 30 thousand bucks. 

I got a new bag just for 4 thousand

What would you know, have you ever been in an international flight?

Well I don't care if it's 2000 I'm buying it

Yeah! I know these chola tastes great but it's nothing like what I had in Dubai, when I visited it, Dubai! I visited , Dubai!

Who shows off Visiting Dubai right? Dude I've been to Australia and I must tell you I'm not gonna show off about it. Even though I stayed in a 5 star hotel and travelled business class.

He's obviously rich look at his spects, atleast 8 thousand it must be, Ray Ban

Sounds familiar? Is it you or the guy next to you ? Ever heard any of these or said something like this?

In the age of advancement we live in, we're somehow programmed to stereotype people based on the money their parents have Or the place where they belong to or the language they speak.

And I'll be lying if I'd say I'm not a part of this vicious instinct of stereotyping people.

And who are we kidding we are all money minded people. And everyone's showing off the money they haven't even earned and in some cases money they don't even have.

I wasn't finished learning all the Hindi words yet and somehow NOT knowing Hindi is the new status symbol. A very much known class of people who feel superior to others just because they don't know the language of their own nation.

Well, if you look closely to a typical conversation between people whether its a couple of friends, lovers, or colleagues you'll find a real life Santa-Banta joke. Each trying to demean other showing off or just disagreeing to what one says. A conversation at work is basically a highly encrypted exchange of information/view/opinion which would be framed very precisely as it passes on from one ear to another.

Whether you're in school or college or office or in a train or at a bus stop, the truth is you're being judged at every moment. The way you stand, walk , talk, your ideas, your dress up and we are all a part of this we pass our judgement about someone based on the way we want them to be. 

From the age of 18 to 28 all sorts of problem most of us have could be solved with money: How to get a girlfriend? How to get into a decent college? How to buy Royal Enfield? How to earn more money? How to feel good about oneself?

Yes! the answer to everything from the day you start living to the day you die: Big Bucks

And then you grow up and realize now the question is; Do you have money?

And the answer ironically is another question: How much?

From showing off the money you haven't earned you end up showing off the money you did earn. Or in some cases it's just a legacy passed on. 

But are we meant to do this? Or in the fear of losing the race we think life is we just find ways to make ourselves feel better.

When you have to sit in a cubicle for an entire day with nothing to do you start observing people, their actions, reactions, and what not.
And you start thinking all sort of crap.

Is this going to change?
Or is it the way it's always gonna be?
And then you look at your family, relatives, friends, their family and their friends, and random people walking on the road and random people sleeping on the road,
And realize...
It's never gonna change.

P.S.- That's what a motivational speech to earn money and start working hard sounds like.
Self five

The Truth Teller

                       Change-O-Phobia

With the development of intellectual stability in a human mind we begin to understand and create hypothesis of our own. However, being a part of a country with several languages,  religions,  and beliefs we are induced with the regressive beliefs followed by centuries of generations scared of a very basic procedure "Change"

Change in each form is resisted and is objectionable even if someone else does it.  We come from a lovable society  all that, what's wrong is with the things we love like infanticide, dowry or you know 33 crore gods.

We say we are democratic we have our basic rights reserved but somehow we are slaves to our own "Culture".  Now It might sound hard to hear but keeping all those sentiments aside "Society (comprising of our relatives) isn't always right".

We belong to a generation who grow a conscience of their own at a very early age and believe in the concept of change. Whether it's the right to choose our own life partners or the ability to believe in any form of God we reserve our rights to do so.  However this is considered as an influence from Western culture and is resisted in every possible way by our Change-O-Phobic society.

All that matters is we're lagging socially.  There's an entire generation that's living a life from several generations back and then there are we people who are willing to move forward.

We need a changeable society. 
"When a lot of people start believing in the same thing it is assumed to be a fact but if there's more people who believe in the contrary, creates alternate beliefs. "

Because,
"Rigid thoughts lead to Concrete decisions. And change is nothing but a series of correct decisions. "

How to get a "Girlfriend". (What not to do)

CHAPTER 2

You might also wanna read http://ironiceuphoria.blogspot.in/2016/11/how-to-get-girlfriend-what-not-to-do.html

This chapter is a story about a guy who fell for a girl and got her.
It all starts with that day when he first saw her on a bus stop she was walking with a couple of her friends and totally minding her own business. The moment he saw her, he felt that someone has stepped right on his heart, he felt a little pain going through his chest right down his spine it was weird and beautiful But soon he realized it was his friend who had punched him right there. (I know, bad joke right?). His friend just asked him to check her out to which our guy had the classic "Bhabhi hai teri" response which eventually means he is in love.

A week passed and everyday he used to stare at her in all possible ways which was not making her uncomfortable, like at all. she used to think, Wow! strange guy staring continuously without blinking its like a dream come true. (Certainly not a good one).

The next day when she was passing he said something gross about her and started singing a song about how she should do stuffs he would like and they should go somewhere alone and do stuffs nobody would get to know of. (You'll never figure out the song). Ironically the girl liked the fact that he tried to embarrass himself and was trying to show off his so low self esteem that she agreed to go out with him but eventually it didn't work out and they'd have to break up.

So, one day when our guy was all high and drunk, he was out with his friends who were also drunk and high. Somehow they got to talking about how the girl broke his heart and how sad he was since then, and that he had to drink and do nothing all day but lie around which was almost similar to what he used to do before but now it's different because now he has someone to blame it upon. During all of this discussion someone had the craziest idea, "Why don't you call her and abuse her".
 The most manly thing one could ever think of (of course that's the penis talking) was calling a girl after drinking and getting rid of your frustration.

Now, for all those who find this story stupid or gross or unreal I appreciate you.
Yes, the story of this guy is nothing but stupid & gross & unreal but what's that's real is whether you're a guy or a girl that we all have seen a guy like this and we've all witnessed such incidents and did nothing about it. So, next time you meet someone like this tell them in high pitched and clear words,

LESSON 2:  Don't be that guy. Every single statement in this story is something you shouldn't do if you want to get a girlfriend.

What If?! (A Tiny Tale)

That night there was an epiphany.
He had a cricket match against Pakistan the next day.
He stopped for a bit and a couple of minutes later made a ISD call again on the same cellphone number.
"Yeah?! What happened?" she asked worryingly.
He thought for a moment and consciously asked, "Will you marry someone whose life is of a size of kit bag?".

A heartbeat skipped. She gasped and replied with joy, "Yes. Of course you idiot! I've been waiting for you to say this for so long!"

And this time it was a slightly different MSD story than the one we all know about.

Its an alternate route which could have been possible for MSD's life. May be he couldn't stop the mishap which was going to happen the next day, but he could have definitely saved himself from the burden of not saying what she wanted to hear.
Often there are times in our lives when we don't say what we are meant to. We make decisions we regret later. We get succumbed either by our ambitions, routine, obligations, responsibilities and what not. In this chain of events we sometimes forget what makes us happy and what will actually stay with us.
But having those choices made already, we later think what could have been possible if we took the alternate route.

"What if I didn't opt this route?"

"What if I simply trusted my instincts and went with the flow to say it all?"

More than anything else, we regret that we made someone wait to hear those words and one day we realize that its too late now.
When we go through this line of thought, we learn a lot about the tricks life plays with us.

The tiny story depicted above asks us to be reciprocative and too believe in our intuitions. If it feels right, why wait? Trust me, there will never be a time when you feel you're ready for it. The point is to say what you feel before it's too late.

English Vinglish

This post is strictly meant for humor and if you find it offensive in any sense please stop doing such stuff that I get to make fun of you.

BASED ON REAL EVENTS

I know the title here is copied but I haven't seen the film and this post would be nothing like it.
We live in a country of 22 official languages English being one of them. I know it and I'm self aware of the fact that I am no master of the language neither I'm going to mock those who aren't that good with it. But, somehow from various incidents that I've witnessed, I have got this idea that we aren't just communicating in English we are defecating in it too.

So, all I'm gonna do is point out some stuffs we say to sound 'cool' on a daily basis and make fun of those who do it.

We people do a no. of experiments and a lot of various stuffs to sound KEWL, however, I do not understand that what's so kewl about WrItiNg LiKe ThIs As If YoUr CaPsLoCk Is MaStUrBaTiNg.
May be there's a lot I do not understand but I do understand that the primary task of a language is to communicate and how I understand but you speak in words jumble my feel like me head struck in someone's large fucking ass.

Social media is a hub of people trying to pretend what they are not and failing it pretty bad at it. I feel sad for people who are struggling so hard that one day they wake up and had to post something like:

Also you get to witness a series of epic fails where all people like me would do is sit back stare at it and smile.

Enclosing I'd like to say I don't even know why I posted this. These are some weird stuff from my head I observe and pass away.

People reading this, I have a serious request to make,

Next time when you see someone showing off their not so cool swag and you find it pretty sick and crappy, please DUNN do anything

Sit back, stare and smile.

Weird post signing off.

Stay tuned